I go back to when I breastfed Aria; tears running down my face each time from the inordinate connection, from that unprecedented unconditional love, from this surreal feeling which simply overwhelmed me on every single level every single time. “I made this human, this little being was made in me, she came out of me!”, I persistently told myself.

You gaze and gaze at your newborn and can’t believe your own eyes!

On the second child, you are familiarized with that phenomenal feeling, bit by bit you’ve accustomed your mind, vibrations and your emotions to that magic. The miracle has somehow fitted into your brain and has become part of your skin and life.

With the first child you don’t just welcome a child into your world, you welcome a whole new world, a whole new you, a whole new love you never contemplated your heart feeling. You welcome the new hood of parenthood and motherhood, and it all just is SO incredible and SO incredibly new, like a whole new platform of existing..!

With your second child, you are already at what feels like the epitome of motherhood and mother nature. You got the heart of a mother, the instincts of a mother, the everything that you once welcomed and were hit with in the coming of your firstborn. The second time round you welcome an additional new treasure into your heart and life and you love them instantly JUST as much. And though there are on the second time round, a million other things stealing the second comer from full and undivided attention, the coming is solely about him or her. You simply welcome him or her into this world. Nothing more nothing less. And that, that’s so precious. So special in its own different way; and the emotion, too deep too fast.

My sweet Aloe, I may not have breastfed you in long sentimental quiet sessions composed of lullabies, humming and lots of (hormonal) tears and (freakishly) endless staring…but in my heart I know it and you should know it too, amidst the madness and exhaustion, the past year with you has been way too good and the best parts of it are made up of warm hugging breastfeeding sessions with you.

Love and light,

Mummy.