Today’s societies seem to praise, admire and promote individualism, shifting so much focus to the ‘I’ instead of the ‘we’, and although being ourselves, exploring and discovering our individuality and living in authenticity is something one cannot stress enough and ever so vital, we still need to remember that the ‘we’ is likewise important. In other words, the development of the ‘self’ does not and should not result in the neglect of the ‘team’; one should not happen at the sacrifice of the other!
The media keep focusing on ‘this and that’ individual, “that player who scored the goal”, “this musician who sang”, but nobody seems to write an article or at least make some sort of reference to the other co-players who helped that player score, the musicians who played beautifully the instruments creating the melody sang by that front stage lead singer..! Once it becomes a habit to name, recognise and applause only that one person, once we get used to taking for granted the little united efforts which happen in front of us or even backstage which help create the big show, once the miracles and magic before us are treated as achievements of that “one individual” one too many times, we are then programmed and into the custom of giving our attention solely to the ‘I’. And that is not only far from being fair, but it is also incorrect as well as a vicious cycle in which we trap our own selves into. We place so much expectation on the ‘I’ and how well that ‘I’ will go alone, how far that one person will achieve, will fly, will do all on his own, something which subconsciously creates unnecessary existential stress and pressure. And this pressure is spread from adults to children.
We are by nature gregarious empathic beings. Teamwork and togetherness increase feelings of well-being. Statistics carried out by psychologists have proven that people by and large derive more satisfaction when they achieve things as a team because they are fed not only with the emotion of contentment and ecstasy found in success but also that found in togetherness, unity and close intimacy. Let’s remind ourselves that whatever we achieve, the big goal or the pass to that scorer right before he shoots that goal or even the pass before that, is just as important and as worthy-of-applause as that big goal, and is okay, it’s enough-! If everyone aims to score, who will make that back pass? And if everyone wants to shoot a goal, isn’t the whole game doomed to fail? Let’s also remember what my mama always used to say, that 1 plus 1 equals 11 not 2, and that as a team we work better and everyone benefits from it in the long run. From now on, let’s start to think of the next generation and let’s satisfy not our ego, but our inherent need for companionship and attachment.
Love & Light,
Tania Pirilidou