Being a mum is definitely an incomparable and invaluable experience…it’s an inconceivably magical journey, a university one never graduates from, a job with no hours, days off or even a retirement scheme (!), a role that is as demanding as it is sacred, a bond that is strong like no other! It’s fair to say that becoming a mother is truly one of the greatest life blessings..!
Having said that, being a NEW mum is undoubtedly a separate experience on its own…one that never gets repeated, nor could ever be replaced…one special category ALL on its own..! That virginity and innocent naivety vividly present as elements in the whole process, all along accompanied by this glad anticipation for each and every next step, the excitement behind your deep curiosity, the thrill of the unknown and the lack of know-how on soooo many matters, from the smallest to the biggest, coupled with that super-dooper almost-magic knowledge that suddenly and intuitively reaches you and is in fact born together with your first child, all in all making it a remarkably special and unforgettable experience! (If only an extra pair of hands was born on each mother for each of her children that’d be brilliant too but that’s another topic for discussion altogether! Plus most of us would turn into octopuses so I have to say, nature knows best!)
Mums with more than one child can probably vouch and are in a better position to tell us if indeed that’s the case but I reckon it doesn’t take a genius to know that a first-time motherhood, like everything in life done for the very first time, has that “first time” profusion of sentiment and glittery wow-ness to it!
Starting from the making of the bedroom of the tiny intruder whose arrival you are waiting for with the grandest welcoming arms, to the several nights you took the time to calmly sit on the rocking chair of his or her bedroom, checking and rechecking that everything’s been placed in the perfect order…“no that pillow sits better over there” and “I’m moving the mint unicorn back where I had it yesterday, it looked better, don’t you think?!” (all of which appear as probably trivial matters or at best “a luxury” on your second child),…reaching even the point that you become impatient and dare I say, bored waiting for your baby to come out, with your anxiety towards the end reaching sky-high levels…to then move to the overwhelming coming of the baby, to the “Am I holding it right?” “Must I use a bath sponge?” “Is she feeding enough?” “Do I wake her up to eat?” and the million other questions passing through a new mother’s head, whilst at the same time she miraculously has all the answers to all the questions right in the palm of her hands!
Next follows equanimity; ahhhh…the silence after the big storm, a state of nirvana..; you are living your own little story in human kind which assimilates the fairy tales you’ve placed all your faith and imagination into when once a young little girl yourself! You are not just a girl living life any longer…oh no, now you are a Mother! And saying that you are convinced you are such a special case with a very serious responsibility…You feel like a unique fairy, a fairy of motherhood who has been recently visited by the supernatural and touched by the extraordinary and you somehow carry this unprecedented sense of achievement and intuition, feeling like an almighty omniscient creature, finally in total alignment with your purpose in life and in sync with the entire nature and humankind.
Soon comes the “routine”, wanting to get it all right, never getting it ALL right and the inevitable frustration that comes as a result thereafter…the exhaustion of your body, the fatigue of no longer finding any time for your own things, the getting used to that, the acceptance of all of that..! And as the year progresses, every once in a while, you miss something from your old life but before you figure out what, you conclude that you miss nothing, as you absolutely love being a mum and you cannot contemplate, you cannot even imagine a second of a life without being one!
Until one day so very soon your baby turns one and that “new mum” condition starts to fade…to find its balance and rhythm and you timidly begin to take your first steps in relocating yourself back on your own life’s map.
“Mama” says a sweet tender voice and you melt, certain that your life will from now on sail onto new tides and different realms…
“God, she’s grown so fast” you think as those heavy steps you took with a big bumpy belly are still so fresh in your memory and soon a bittersweet melancholy takes over; you already miss your baby even as you delight in your amazing toddler!
New mum – what a blessed and rich experience this has been!
Love & Light,